The greatest commercial of all time. Ever.

I thought for sure this was a gag. Or some sort of spoof. An infauxmercial. But I now know this is for real.

I don't know who are the ad wizards behind this one, but I demand they show themselves so I can give them a medal. And speaking of medals, did you know that shamwows are used by Olympic divers? I didn't either.

Is the actual shamwow product great? Probably not. I mean it's got the word 'sham' in it. But who cares? It's got Vince Offer (are you kidding?) as your pitchman and that's all you need to know. Vince is the ring-toss carnie who makes fun of you after each throw. Imagine Ty Pennington, but more hyper. Vince doesn't just sells ice to eskimos, he makes them eat yellow snow. He says things like "you following me camera guy" and "the Germans always make good stuff" and my favorite, "hey, we can't do this all day." Vince is annoyed, and apparently quite busy. more >>>

Are there holes in this :60 tour de force? Sure. There's the hilarious voiceover dubbing of '10 years' when he's covering his mouth. Then there's the before-after comparison, where the soda's mysteriously gone outside the carpet swatch when it's time for the shamwow. Or him ever-so-gently damping the towel on the spill, then subsequently rinsing out Niagara Falls into a bowl. But you forget about those things when you realize you've been throwing your money away on paper towels like some idiot.

The shamwow mops the floor with Billy Mays and wipes that crazy look off Tony Little's face.

Thank you, shamwow. I'll never actually buy your product, but I'll never look at German engineering the same way again.